@Linza voterprotection@votefromabroad.org will contact everyone and their uncle to open cases very fast

Everyone has kind of laughed it off but there’s actually now an official investigation by multiple organizations into why my US election ballot hasn’t been released from US customs in a month without any explanation.

24th of Owltober!
Samantha the Barred Owl is burrito-wrapped so her carers can trim her beak and talons. She was an ambassador owl at a bat clinic (Save the Bats) which is fitting because today begins Bat Conservation Week (24-31 Oct). Source: https://instagram.com/p/BeioOkLBXpM/ #owlsintowels #owltober 💛🦉🦇

Today, a small child of a friend ran up to me excitedly, and said "Can I tell you my new joke?".

The joke:

Q. What starts with "D" and has no end?

A. Death.

I was not expecting this.

💀

@JessicaAnnEng My daughter got in trouble at school for calling out a teacher for using AI to generate a poster.

It was the art teacher.

The poster was to promote a student art competition.

#Spotted on Market Day in Aotearoa New Zealand

A man (80s?) with a prodigious bushy moustache takes a bite from a cream donut and SQUISH.
Cream covering his moustache and squootling up his nostrils.
His wife howling with laughter.

A tiny human (2?) is crouched next to a culvert, peering inside and pointing.
Asking Mum: "What's IN there?"
Mum says: "Probably some bugs."
Tiny Human Culvert Scientist looks offended at the lack of rigorous evidence to back up this statement. "NO MUM! There's not enough ROOM!"

A tiny human (1.5?) has got Dad's car keys in his hands and is off!
Toddle-galloping through the markets.
Dodging and weaving!
Chortling and giggling!
Will he get away?!
(Dad in hot pursuit!)

A young human (8?) is RACING through the markets.
Holding a paper bag out in front of him.
Expression urgent as he passes his Mum's stall while bellowing: "IT'S AN EMERGENCY! DAD NEEDS HIS COOKIE!"

A woman (60s?) is addressing a herd of ice-cream covered small humans (3-6?)
Hands on hips, she says: "Okay my little fraggles, how about we take you all to the park and wear you out?"
Little Fraggles think this is a marvellous idea.

Any typos spotted in this post are very much looking forward to the Ngatimoti Festival tomorrow. If typos spotted, they'll be happily munching a cookie they got at the markets. (It was an emergency!)

Kitten basket! 🐱🖤🤍 #FosterKittens #cats #CatsOfMastodon

Where is the "B Ark" launch when you need it?

#DouglasAdams

At the kid's school "harvest festival" (Halloween fund raiser, parent run carnival games, tickets for a raffle, that kind of stuff).

Wife is the financial secretary of the PTA, so working with money stuff.

I'm just hanging out, fetching things as needed.

The "kid energy" of kids being kids, wearing costumes, chasing each other around, is invigorating.

There is a dad in zombie makeup, singing rock songs badly on an electric guitar, having a great time.

For one moment, all is right.

Do you need a video of #kittens playing with crunchy paper? Probably, but I'm not a cop.

My kind of white mage

Mood

Maybe baking "trusted" certificates into every OS, browser, and programming library out there was a bad way to manage certification.

The best murder weapon ever would be a Tupperware lid - because no one would ever find it!

#jokeoftheday #murdermystery

@nyankat seeing your display name just now, I thought how awesome "Lorry" would be for a name for an opossum.

#random

You don't want to rely on willpower, self-control, or "feeling motivated" to continue a new behavior. If that's your plan, you *will* fail.

Change your environment and build habits. Ideally, you don't want to have a choice about whether or not to do the new behavior. It should be easier to do the "right thing" than to fall back to the old behaviors.

Also, use accountability, if possible. Knowing that someone else will know when you fail is a good motivator.

RT @RobotLyra

I love lagomorphs, because on the one side you have sweet round bois, and on the other side you have feral wilderness prophets who have gone mad with the knowledge of the universe

@action_jay@loops.video @action_jay@thecanadian.social

Aw, proud dad! That’s what I want for my kids, too. It please me so much to see how they’ve grown into kind, curious young adults. They’ve surrounded themselves with good friends and I feel like they’ll be okay. That matter so much more than grades.