I'm supporting this band next month and they have a new album coming out today.

Some cool German dudes making minimalist, rhythmic and repetitive groove patterns in the tradition of early Kraftwerk and cult labels Brain and Sky. Now on tour, possibly coming to a place near you?

Obviously I recommend their show in Deptford, the global centre of coolness on the 29th August but other shows are available.

https://konformer.bandcamp.com/album/konformer-ii

#LiveMusic #IndependentMusic #Groove #Bass

I’ve just remembered about the existence of the Condiment Cow, and found out that there’s also a Condiment Sow!

https://www.condimentcow.com/

A women's collective in Belfast raised more than £250,000 and rehoused 200 families following the racist pogroms in the city last month.

https://www.thecommunityreporter.co.uk/p/womens-collective-raises-over-250k

#UKPolitics #NIPol #FuckTheFash #SolidarityIsBeautiful

Apparently kid watched Ice Age in Georgraphy "because Miss had a migraine"

"Perfecting my flams, Pams"

Steve Gadd in a polycule with multiple Jills, why not, it was the 70s

Honestly those drums.
"Busy practicing fills, Jills"

Return from whence you came, Wayne

Defederate, mate

Just say you're too sad, Steve Gadd (but finish laying down this astonishing drum track first, please)

Jump into a hedge, Wedge (the X-wing guy)
That's a total of 51, it's actually difficult to stop

Skulk in a well, Belle
Go inter-railing, AC Grayling
Sign up as a nun, hun
Sink into the dirt, Burt
Get abducted by a roc, Jock
Dive in the sea, Bree
Take a bridge over troubled water, Walter
Kill yourself, Nigel

Become a recluse, Bruce
Row down the stream, Cream (the band)
Jump off a cliff, Cliff
Hide in a shaft, Shaft
Fall in a crevasse, lass
Hide in the bin, Evelyn
Transform into sand, Ayn Rand
Become one with a tree, Fi
Come out as gay, Ray
Borrow a horse, Morse
Or even a camel, Mark Hamil
Fly like a bird, Douglas Hurd

Melt into the air, Clare
Use your jetpack, Mac
Take your canoe, Lou
Or your kayak, Jack (a different Jack)
Identity theft, Jeff
Become the Pope, Hope
Or simply a priest, Mr Beast
One of those railroad things, you know, with the pump handle
Just go away, Fay
Simply fuck off, Bough
Enrol with Nasa, Yasser
Go live in a cave, Dave
Skate like a demon, Ian
Take an NPC’s quest, Jo Guest

OK, here are another 45, Paul Simon, which I came up with in just over half an hour, a half hour you clearly couldn't spare in 1975 you idle bastard.
Get on the train, Lorraine
Hotwire a car, Shah [of Iran]
Beam up to space, Ace
Run like Steve Cram, fam
Just roll down the hill, Bill
Pop to the shops, Knops*
Get on the ferry, Perry
Hop on the Tube, dude
Skedaddle you should, Yaddle
Hide in the laundry, Audrey
Get on your bike, Ike

*This is what Mark Knopfler’s friends call him

yes don't worry I'm thinking of another 45, I've got 11 so far

It's not even really five, they're all basically "just fuck off without saying a word" I mean it was the 70s but come on

Just heard '50 Ways to Leave Your Lover' which always annoys me, I mean, it's a great song but how many ways to leave your lover does it actually give? Oh is it five? FIVE, Paul Simon???? you lazy cunt

I wouldn't have thought a tattoo would "take" on feathers, but I'm not a vet.

Actually don't know the context of this, whether it is just someone messing about, or a genuine attempt at advertising.