Backing up a few steps.

We would, with 2 cats, 2 dogs, and a 2 year old, effectively move from OR to AZ seasonally. When in OR we would rent the house to travel nurses through a program. When in AZ same program renting to travel nurses. To be clear we were not making money off this. We were paying the mortgage, bills, and putting a few hundred a month into a savings account to address any emergent things.

So yeah, it was a total fucking nightmare moving 2x each year. Up until I got married I had moved a total of 4 times in my entire life.

We mutually-ish agreed this sucked and something needed to change. She didn't want to manage the rental in OR so we liquidated everything.

We bought this house that was _way_ out of our budget and burned *all* the proceeds.

So here I am enumerating all this because I have been thinking: is this what the rest of my life is? How much longer do we stay here? Where do we move, again, whenever whatever happens to trigger a move event?

Not only "is this my life" but over all this is so stressful. Friends I have owner a fucking house for the last almost 15 years and not stayed at any given one longer than 4 years. I mean completely ignoring the financials but what the fuck. What the *fuck*.

This all makes me feel sick. Hundreds of thousands of dollars gone. Forever. Places I loved gone. Forever. Now we just.. I guess wait to move again? How the fuck did I even get to this point?