@prism I just read all 117 in this thread, and some people really are pricks. Shouldn't be let out of the house honestly.
I'm sorry this happened. first thing I did when installing this machine was build a tool to make it piss off. Immediately.
It will not help you this time, but maybe tomorrow, next week, next month if you ever have to reinstall.
https://3.onj.me/programs/OnedriveFixes.zip