@aaron @agentultra, I'm so glad to see there are more people doing this! Compiling a guide would definitely be a good thing, but just compiling it is not enough: it should be maintained and updated as things progress and change.

I too am self-hosting my email and am absolutely pissed that delivering to #GmailIsNotEmail is a royal pain in the ass: even if Google's own Postmaster Tools indicates full compliance, my emails to people I hadn't contacted before often ended up in their spam mailbox without me or them knowing. At the same time, "deliverability analysis" would not report anything due to "too low level of incoming messages". I ended up setting up a cron job just to send emails to my Gmail mailbox a few times each hour in order to overcome the volume issue, and now at least that complaint is gone (funny, the analysis now says that over 0.1% of my messages are marked as spam, even though their own Spam dashboard indicates no such thing).

As for DMARC, I'm using a free service from Postmark: they receive all my DMARC reports and send me a weekly email with overall stats for the week. For me, this has been working fine for quite a while.