I could be the first person ever to discover roast parsnips with pesto. It's unlikely but not impossible. You'd never know, would you? You just don't think to question this sort of stuff. Maybe not that because it's quite obvious - I assume other people think to pair things that start with the same letter. Like wearing pink pyjamas and smoking a pipe. Pouring a pitcher of Pimms into a piano. It's the most natural thing in the world. But perhaps not....... Grapes with...... Sriracha. Because that would be fucking mental. Or...... New TikTok trend? You are literally never going to believe this.... Looked it up and it is genuinely a viral TikTok trend. God and irony are dead dead dead. Is it ironic? (don't you think?) I genuinely believe we have at least one original thought in each of us. Let's do it now. Think of one thing that is entirely original. You can do it. I'd give you some pointers but we only have all of current human knowledge to draw from, which invariably leads us to thoughts that have already been thunk. We need new ways. New paths to follow. Or maybe not even paths. But to step through a doorway to another way. Become a helicopter blade and slowly rotate off into the atmosphere - change up our perspective to come up with a never-before thought thought, liiiiiike.............. A collapsed star trapped in a soap bubble, impossible symbiotic physics - a perfect structure. Equal pressure containing all of the force within a gossamer thin shell. True natural beauty. Finally understanding, delivered as a physical metaphor. The saviour of our human condition, bootstrapping the next phase of our evolution. We are all collapsing stars, and only the fragile nature of soap holds us back from imploding and taking out the whole fucking neighborhood. Is this a new thought? I feel dangerously close to something. What would we evolve into? Ha-HA! It's a trick! We'd go BACKWARDS into monkeys. Monkeys are the ideal form. We'd just smash the shit out of our smartphones and go and live up a tree. Checking each other for nits and chewing on some grass. Ocassionally just having a lovely big scream. I long to be a monkey.
