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  • ungualdoriane
    Jun 14, 2026, 12:03 PM

    the paradox is that having *practically unverifiable definitions* on words that are used in *casual social settings* is a lie.

    we can't keep a notion of sex (and male and female) that isn't cultural and social, not because of bodies, not because of science, not because of normativity (which we could all go into and find paradox there too) but firstly because of language and the way we use words. the cop at the airport security scan has pressed the F button when i pass the portal. Dr have asked my trans women friends if they had their period or if they're on a contraceptive. there are so many examples.

    trans women can change their genitalia. when we take hormones our balance is the same than menopaused cis women on hormones because we take the same thing. if anyone would say but what about chromosome i think i'd just look at them in the eyes in silence and whisper... are the chromosomes in the room with us right now? and the uterus... oh my god not this one. sure defining the female sex with the ability to bear a child could lead to nothing wrong for woman on a large political scale right? if we do produce such a dichotomy between gender and sex we ends up with the same transphobic arguments just now postponed to the notion of sex, that ultimately can produce violence on both cis and trans woman.

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Replies

  • ungualdoriane
    Jun 14, 2026, 12:14 PM

    that's also why some of us revendicate the term transsexual.

    which originally was an alienating psychiatric diagnosis, then removed at some point because of its obsolescence in face of the new, well-educated and politically correct, gender sex dichotomy. a dichotomy that silently says: all your efforts to transition will only change half of what you are, your sex is fixed. and even if i would agree with that, because the way we use words and languages it make those notion permeable... also, and particularly, in the head of the biggot. viciously leading to: because you can't change sex, you'll experience transphobic biases that actually are social and cultural.

    by saying i'm a transsexual we're like fuck your cis bullshits that pretend to not see how language works, and to not see what our transitions produces on both culture and science and all the rest.

    ultimately, i love the linguistic approach to this and how Amanda Montell in her book wordslut, says that the difference between "woman" and "female" is that, in practice in the english language (based on huge corpus of texts) "female" is mostly used in misogynistic arguments when the speaker want to claim that women are "biologically inferior". which well... why do they know about the chromosomes or uterus of this "crazy female" they're talking about.

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  • ungualdoriane
    Jun 15, 2026, 10:48 AM

    so since everyone is begging to know this is my best attempt at portraying what gender kinda is to me...

    my definition of sex is mostly: using patriarchal science authority to enact socio-culturally implemented sexism or something

    a graphviz representation of the feedback loop of gender through language and experience, the self and others
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  • ✨ trash enchantressmokosh@weirder.earth
    Jun 15, 2026, 1:46 PM

    @doriane this is now my second favorite summary of gender

    my favorite is still the one from imogen binnie's nevada, something along the lines of "gender is a construct - so are traffic lights, and if you ignore either of them, you get hit by a car. which is also a construct"

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  • ungualdoriane
    Jun 15, 2026, 2:17 PM

    @mokosh haha this is banger!!! i love it!!!

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  • ungualdoriane
    Jun 15, 2026, 2:18 PM

    @mokosh i also remember the silliest one i've heard which is "the difference between gender and sex is that right now i don't have sex" .................

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  • ✨ trash enchantressmokosh@weirder.earth
    Jun 15, 2026, 2:40 PM

    @doriane the book is really great and has aged well. still the only trans novel i can read again and again without being annoyed at the author, just peak cynical millennial trans girl representation

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  • ✨ trash enchantressmokosh@weirder.earth
    Jun 14, 2026, 12:27 PM

    @doriane but more categories will always fix everything,right

    like, that's also why people have started to differentiate between nationality/ethnicitiy when asking where you're from. they're no longer content with what's in your papers (because they assume you can easily change that, that's what they read on the internet), they want to know what you really are. and no they do not care about your own opinion

    but i feel that all of this is because they define themselves by as many categories as possible. the more categories you have, they more rigid the singular categories become, and the more unchangeable they feel. because freedom is scary, everyone hates making their own decisions. there's a contradiction? well shit, let's make another category

    see and that's why all the trans girls are using linux, they have already started challenging defaults, why stop there

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  • ✨ trash enchantressmokosh@weirder.earth
    Jun 14, 2026, 12:33 PM

    @doriane but yeah nah, personally i went through a whole transsexual awakening there. in my teens i would fight for the differentiation of sex and gender (i blame tumblr), in my twenties i gradually became disillusioned and angry (i blame gender discourse going mainstream), and in my 30s i don't give a fuck about any gender theory that academic cis people come up with (i blame hanging out with academic cis people), and i will proudly use terms like tranny for myself & my friends (because that is a privilege i get over the cissies). anyone who wants to analyze what i am can fuck right off. or fuck me, that depends on them.

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  • ungualdoriane
    Jun 14, 2026, 1:27 PM

    @mokosh yes same feeling here 🫂

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