Lucinda wasn’t sure how to react to her disappointment. She’d expected a heavenly official in gold and finery and Mor was anything but that. Her mind tried to tell her that this was clearly not her escort but there was no doubt in her soul. She could hear the whispers of the trees confirming it, and generally gossiping while sharing pollen. Trees are quite lewd and perverse.

She settled for straightening up and calling for her disciples and servants to come attend to her escort.

“Most Gracious Lady of Heaven, we welcome you into this-”

“I guess you are the task I’ve been assigned?”

“Yes Beneficent Holy one, my name is Lu---”

“Do you have any chicken around? I would kill for some chicken. Or a donkey if chicken isn’t available.”

Lucinda wondered if this was a test, but if it was it was the most basic easy test. Everyone knew that consuming other living creatures was anathema to heaven. It didn’t make sense that her escort would. Her brain screeched to a stop like a water-buffalo hitting an elephant square between its rear cheeks. Was…. Did…

It took a while for her brain to process the paperwork her eyes were sending it. First her brain rejected it as a mistake. Then as an illusion. Then as some cruel joke.

On Mor’s hip hung the corpses of three flamingos and she was picking her teeth with the bones of a fourth.

“Oh. I see you’ve figured out that I’m not exactly in Heaven’s good graces.”

Lucinda didn’t have a response to this at all. She just stared in shock and anger. Yes, anger. Negative emotions aren’t exactly approved of in heaven but anger at the sins of the world was acceptable in the right circumstances.

“Yeah I’m also not pleased. Your place here is a very … well, you can see.” Mor gestured at her whole body, still covered in the swamp.

By this point the disciples and servants had arrived with towels, blankets, a large tub of hot water, scented soaps and scrubbing flowers. But they stood stunned just like the Saint they followed.

“Look, give me a bath, and some food, and I’ll stop offending your precious feelings. Then we can start getting this chore over with.”

To the embarrassment and horror of everyone present, Mor began undressing right there, dropping the muck clothes onto the muddy road, then she wandered over to the tub.

“Unless you want to carry me too you’ll want to put that down.”

The tub was placed hurriedly on the ground.

Mor climbed in and sunk into the tub until only her eyes and the top of her head remained outside of the water.

Lucinda stared at those bright shining blue eyes glowing over the dark water and slowly recited the thousand prayers for patience of Saint Andrew the Educator of Wealthy Scions. Then she recited the seven hundred hopes of Saint Miriam the Builder of Schedules.

“Your excellency, I will be grateful for your kindness in assisting me on this blessed task. I will be understanding of the great stresses you must have suffered falling from such an wonderful height down to our lowly status. May I know the many names by which you are known.”

A series of bubbles rose up in the water and upon popping let out horrible smells. They also let out a single phrase. “You can call me Mor”.

Lucinda bowed, glad at least that one courtesy had not been forgotten.

“Mor, I am Saint Lucinda Marisol Ibarra of the lowest circles.”

Another series of bubbles with stench and sound.

“Yeah, I will call you Lucymar.”

Lucinda straightened and turned and walked away in the exactly beauty and patience of someone who is this close to giving up on heaven and just taking a forked spatula and spelling out their frustrations on someone else's hide.

Mor giggled into the water and closed her eyes, saying to no one and everyone:

“She’s almost fun.”