Power cycled. Back to base level of dysfunction but at least I have a watch face again.

And remember, you can't power-cycle the watch using its buttons. Long press brings up an AI assistant because of course it does.

Power cycling the watch involves going to the Emegency Call/Dial 911 screen and paging down a ways to get to power icon. Because those are two functions that are closely related: summon paramedics and turn off watch.

Now maybe I can defuse my fury at garbage technology and go back to sleep.