#IFComp '26 results are posted. All the games are there to play now and forever! https://ifcomp.org/comp/2026

Aged 15, we found when you forced the return coin flap out on public phones you could pull the pound coin out, we spent weeks phoning American numbers and when answer phone came we asked if the husband was away, and was it safe to come around my American lover.

He can play drums better than I can!
(everyone can, <sigh> but he's good)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZiTldVGME8

Many interactions on mastodon are like:

Me: Wow, my microwaved popcorn was too hot and I burnt my tongue!

Responder A: You could maybe put the popcorn inside a bucket made of ice to quickly cool it.

Me: I don't want to do that and I also don't have any buckets made of ice.

Responder B: A bucket of ice can be made by putting water between an inner form and an outer form and freezing it.

Me: Ok, but I don't want to do that and it would also take many hours to freeze the water. I am eating popcorn right now.

Responder C: Liquid nitrogen will freeze water in as little as a few seconds and can be purchased at many welding-gas suppliers

For anyone with Roland cloud, today has been a Roland cloud kind of a day.
First I did SRJV conversions for SRX Dance, Keyboards, Orchestra and world which was over a thousand presets from those alone, then I did DW because I'd never tested the drums until now. They're not bad, and you get them as part of Roland cloud ultimate, so I thought why not?
Also did Zenology FX, so lots of updates to enjoy if that's your jam.
You can get all my NKS presets here: https://onj.me/nks

If you can't share or release something in an inclusive and accessible way, it's okay to not share or release it at all.

Some people will vehemently disagree with this. They'll say things like, "But then nobody wins," missing the powerful point that nobody loses either.

1982: The Wonders of Computers | Pebble Mill: Computer Special | BBC Archive
https://youtu.be/P6Q57p-qTpU?is=Smc8LDyRf95szgWx

Wait, there's severance fanfiction? I mean I guess it makes sense.
Your outie...is now an innie
https://archiveofourown.org/works/68953956/chapters/178646666

'Trump Ocean'.... oh, just fuck off and die you utter bellend.

It's constant distraction. Release the fucking Epstein Files.

When I was at school, we had a '5' system for running central down the running track. Mr Spencer would stand at the end with a megaphone shouting '5 5 5' unless you veered off-course in one direction or another. With the recent talk about the 'blind poop' app which has recently diverted to blind feeding, I'm obviously thinking of an app that does the same. Your fork is a bluetooth-connected fork with a speaker in it, and when you're trying very hard to find your own face, it will say 5 until you successfully line it up.
4 is to the left and 6 is to the right. Eventually, after 45 minutes of trying, you will eventually, with supreme difficulty, be able to feed yourself.
I will get vibing this one right away, it's obviously needed.

@bmoore123 Or how about that pesky problem we all faced when we're trying to feed ourselves and we can't see to find our mouth. You could sell a special mount for the phone and set it up right in front of your face and it could give you live, realtime feedback about where the spoon or fork is so that you don't have to be embarrassed about your table manners anymore! You don't have to face the secret shame of being fed like a toddler by your family! You too, can wield a fork, knife, and spoon with precision… But not one of those sharp knives-- oh no, we don't want to push the envelope… Safety first!

a reminder that if you see a vendor having an unscheduled outage today to apply PHP patches - that is actually one of the most encouraging things you can see from an #infosec perspective, because it means

A) someone/some people at the vendor is paying attention

B) that person/people has enough sway to have them bring down prod in the middle of the day to apply patches

C) enough people at the vendor actually know what software they are running to know its an issue that needs to be dealt with

So, reach out to them and let them know you appreciate it - so they have something to show people who push back the next time a similar thing happens

#StroongeCast E110: Would You Trust Them? https://youtu.be/w9vGgflzyvo

This week we're discussing loyalty tests for your significant other.
What does trust mean to you?
Does a loyalty test, in which you get someone to ask your partner for their number or whether they are in a relationship, really help you decide whether to stay with them?

Download: https://onj.me/media/stroongecast/110_-_Would_You_Trust_Them.mp3

What an interesting idea.
Local Wikipedia: The Encyclopedia For Local People
https://edjefferson.com/localwiki/

Railpass simulates a train ride in your browser window using real video footage. Choose from trains from around the world or add some weather to the mix. Sound on for the best ride. https://train.samismith.com

Apparently, my daughter was given an assignment to use generative #AI to create a poster / cover for A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court in her English class. She took offense to this and asked if she could just do the assignment by hand or digitally using one of her #art apps. She was told no. So, my daughter decided to take a stand and not do the assignment. We support her decision completely. Asking someone who lives for creating her own art to use AI and refusing to accept anything else is inexcusable.

Does anyone know where I can get a copy of my book? I need to read it before being interviewed.

"
Dear James Scholes,

I hope you’re doing well.

I’m Luana Ribeira, a host with the Business Innovators Radio, where I interview authors about their books, creative journeys, and the fascinating ideas they share with readers. Your book, Terraformer: Epic Sci-Fi Adventure at the Edge of the Galaxy, caught my attention because An action-filled space adventure detailing a highly specialized corporate engineer caught in an underground planetary rebellion on a frontier world.
"

I don't think anyone on Mastodon needs to hear the obvious criticism of this "Accessible Hygiene Helper" app (which I'm certain is 100% private and totally not streaming your camera feed to a server somewhere). But my favourite part about the AppleVis post is this line:

> I noticed that for visually impaired individuals, independently confirming personal cleanliness after using the restroom can be a frustrating and undignified challenge.

And in a reply to a comment rightfully asking how on earth they came to this conclusion, the developer says:

> Why did I build this? Because behind closed doors, many blind individuals face the hidden anxiety of not knowing if they are clean, and asking a family member for help feels undignified.

"Many blind people", you say? Where are these people? Can the real blind testers please stand up? (After they're done wiping, of course.) Because it seems like you saw one of the many repeat posts of this question on AskReddit, and instead of reading the comments or spending a moment to use your brain, you told Claude to materialize the answer in the form of a $4.99/month website. And now you're deep in sunk cost land and every time someone posts another criticism along the lines of "No-one asked for this", you tell yourself "Surely the next comment will be a thank you? Surely someone will sign up soon? Then I can afford my own toilet paper!"

Anyway, this is a weird timeline. I'd like to switch back to one of the ones where this app doesn't exist.

Philomena: Some people have been writing PHP for over 20 years. Is that because it's particularly difficult to finish?

Expert: No, software is constantly evolving.

Philomena: So they've been writing the same website for 20 years?

Expert: No, different projects.

Philomena: Have they tried finishing one before starting another?

Expert: That's not how software development works.

Philomena: My mate Paul spent 20 years building a shed. Turned out he was just an alcoholic.

Expert: Right.

Philomena: Is PHP like that?

Today, PHP is not 'Pretty Happy People.'