I am currently accepting applications for the position of nemesis.

Your expected duties will be:
-arriving at my evil lair whenever I have an evil scheme
-being trapped by whatever trap I have set up for you
-listening to my evil monologue
-escaping said trap after my monologue is complete
-foiling my evil schemes
-checking up on me when I haven't had an evil scheme in a while
-overall giving me a reason to continue by providing me with an enemy to overcome every time

Being a little animal in a fedora is a plus but not necessary