Computer Should Not Make Noise Unless I Want It To, Explicitly

okay, question:
how the fuck do I turn off these damn boops?
am I blind?

I should have necro'd my account on Halloween, huh?
More Thematically Appropriate and all that.
But hey, I finally dug up the login info again.

Will I be posting more?
Probably not? (famous last words and all that)
But I said I would, so...