Hey, US Christians! Check out Matthew 19:21–22, Jesus set a trap for you
"Jesus said unto him, If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come and follow me. But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful: for he had great possessions."
https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Bible_(King_James)/Matthew#Chapter_19
Rich bro walks up to Jesus like "what's the cheat code for being perfect?"
Jesus goes: "Bet. Sell everything you own, give it all to the poor, and your heavenly treasure is gonna be stacked. Then come hang with me."
Y'ALL. The way this man's face DROPPED. 💀
1/2
He just pivoted away mad sad.
No rebuttal, no follow-up questions, cuz bro had SO much stuff.
The closet was full, the portfolio was diversified, and he was not about to give it up.
Fumbled the ultimate collab over stuff.
Couldn't be me. (It would absolutely be me.)
Anyway, like and follow for part 2, where we talk about the camel and the needle. 🐪✨
#Matthew19 #RichYoungRuler #TreasureInHeaven #LetGoOfTheBag
2/2
@paninid brochacho u made me lol but lit
@jameshowell @paninid where cam I get a copy of this Broble?
#genxtranslation #goldenrule #goodsamaritan
Smartass way in the back raises his hand. And Jesus goes, yeah—you in the back. Smartass goes "Neighbor, neighbor, love my neighbor. Who IS my neighbor, anyway?"
Jesus goes, lemme tell you a story.
Schmuck on the road in the desert by himself. A bunch of guys jump him and take his stuff and kick the crap out of him. They leave him by the side of the road, out cold.
Another guy comes by, sees him lying there, can't be arsed to stop, keeps on going.
ANOTHER guy comes by, sees him lying there, can't be arsed to stop, keeps on going.
The third guy to come by is a Samaritan.
[Now I have to interrupt Jesus' story to explain that when he says "a Samaritan comes by," it was supposed to sound like "an undocumented immigrant comes by," or "a North Korean army general comes by," or maybe "a Trump voter comes by."]
So this filthy Samaritan comes by, and where the regular guys kept on going, the Samaritan stops. He patches the guy up. He carries him to town. He pays an innkeeper to take care of the guy. End of story.
Then Jesus goes, Okay, smartass. Which of those three was the neighbor?
And the smartass goes, Umm? My enemy is my neighbor?
And Jesus goes BOOYAH DIPSHIT