Part of me really thinks we need to come up with a better term for trans folks who identify solely and completely with being just a woman or just a man than “binary.” Please actually try to understand what I’m saying if you do identify as a binary trans man or woman, and know that I’m not questioning you as completely a woman or a man, or challenging your self identification.
What I mean by this is that the “gender binary” is the term activists and scholars developed to describe a structural and cultural system of oppression and violence. It’s parallel to terms like heteronormativity, patriarchy, white supremacy, ableism and similar terms used to describe a system of discrimination and marginalization.
In the original formulations of “transgender,” the literal definition was anyone who crossed or transgressed the ideology or system of the gender binary. The term “non-binary” was developed later to further emphasize for folks where this was essential to their identity and material conditions. When people describe themselves as a binary trans woman or man, I get the impression they are trying to articulate that they don’t fit into their own conception of non-binary or the popular perception of it, and they fully identify with “woman” or “man,” and want to be treated this way and not as a third gender. That’s understandable and makes sense as a clarification or a way of understanding oneself…but the term is where it gets weird.
Like, if a cis woman wanted to emphasize she is a modern woman but still very femme and identifies fully with more traditional ideas of being a woman, it would be weird to call her a “patriarchal woman,” right? That’s why the term “binary trans” rubs my brain wrong, and why I would really love to see us come up with a different word to describe that position within identity.
To be clear, I say this as a self-identified “non-binary trans woman,” because I am fully a woman, but I do not see my womanhood as fitting within the gender binary, I have a sense of identity and fluidity that extends beyond womanhood as well (150% gender!), and my understanding of my past gender experiences and having identified fully as a man shapes my self-conception. Non-binary is not a third gender (that would be better described by a term like genderqueer), but a description of gender that does not align or accord with the ideology of the gender binary.
