Setting up the Big Kid's first ever gaming laptop, and this whole experience has me wanting to hug my PS5 tightly and tell it much I love it.

I can tell I love my job because I have a week off and... I miss working. This is sick.

Dog: (looks at me)
Me: "Okay, look, you can have a tiny bit of cheese. Tiny! But this is it."
Dog: (exists)
Me: "Look, fine, but seriously, this is the last bit."
Dog: (vibrates an atom)
Me: "Oh, go on then. Just don't tell the others."

The thing they don't tell you about getting older is that one day you'll wake up and there'll be a weird gravitational field around your eyebrows, and they are now beyond your control.

Was just reminded of the time I got on TechCrunch for breaking Flickr, which birthed a second award named after me and another friend. And the award for that one was a silver masturbating velociraptor who'd just... finished up. https://techcrunch.com/2010/07/20/flickr-awards-this-years-grant-pattishall-award/

Me, writing code using jQuery on this day, a day which is in the year 2024.

Hey, I don't remember giving consent for the weather to start warming up, what the fuck.

Taking great pleasure in reminding the kids to like and subscribe after I give them their breakfast.

Still Life (Found Footpath Beer with Shadows)

I am playing the new Star War (an early Father's Day pressie), and it is very good and very Star War.

I'll never forget how I almost got banned, as an employee.
https://xoxo.zone/@kevbob/113035469062572519

One of my coworkers was born the year I registered waferbaby.com. This is getting out of hand.

Only one of these is real.

What's the German word for "your kid's best friend is coming over to play, so you're frantically cleaning the apartment shortly before they arrive so her parents don't find out we're actually huge filth wizards?"

Go home, Siri, you're drunk.

Well shit, I blinked and somehow accidentally became a devops person. Help me.

What's a song you'd heard growing up and only later discovered is a cover, and where the original version sounds so weird and "wrong"?

For me, the ones that come to mind are New Order's Bizarre Love Triangle (the Frente! version is canonical in my mind), and Prince's When You Were Mine (Cyndi Lauper).

The toddler is suddenly having an enormous meltdown because he can't go to "Japanese" (Japan) immediately, this very second.

A reminder: RFC stands for Really Fucking Cool.

Oldest domain is 1999, which I guess counts.